I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
