3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize