he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
