Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
