This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
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