This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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