Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
