I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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