im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
