I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
