they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
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