Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
