honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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