She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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