brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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