ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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