Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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