A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
