I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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