so explain again why im purple
no
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
