A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Randomize
