i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
