Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize