How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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