i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Everyone says I win the strip club
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
