i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
