so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
