Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
you win again, gameday.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
