i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Randomize
