i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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