so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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