Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
