Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
