and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
