I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
