how can u be prego again
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
