Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
