whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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