Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
