I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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