The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
