glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize