i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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