butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
