I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
