I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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