That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
someone owes me an orgasm
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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