Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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