Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
