All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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